Say what I intend

I have a group of friends that live all over the country. We try to get together once a year, but it doesn't always happen. Some of us are better about keeping up in between times than others, but everyone comes when we get together. At the end of each of our weekends, one of the girls always says, "I know I say this every time, but I really am going to try to be better at keeping in touch." We all know it's not going to happen, but everyone smiles and hugs and says good bye.

In Haiti, the missionary pastor led our devotions each evening. He asked us to use personal pronouns when we were sharing. Instead of saying, "We say yes, when we mean maybe" he challenged us to say, "I want to be a person of my word. I want to say yes and mean yes. I want to say no and mean no." Using personal pronouns encourages transparency and intimacy. I've really tried hard to do that over the past 6 weeks. When I typed this blog post title, I first typed "Say what we intend" then immediately went back to change it.

I have zero control over what others do.

I do have control over my actions and I can say what I mean. I can follow up on what I have promised. I can say no and not waffle later.

I am working to be better at that!

An Adult Topic...Budget

My computer is old. Really old. Like probably 8 years old...maybe more. So it's slowly dying on me. I'd love for it to last another year, but just not sure if that is going to happen.

I'm planning to move next summer...and would love to buy a condo or townhouse when that happens...but that means a downpayment...and just not sure if that is going to happen.

I have one more semester of grad school...which means tuition. I'd like to do it without getting a loan, but just not sure if that is going to happen.

I had an unexpected expense come up. I mean...I knew the situation of the expense was there...but did not have any idea how much the expense was going to be. It's large...as in...Sigh

...Lord, sometimes I miss being a child and trusting Mom and Dad to figure out all the paperwork part of life.

So many thoughts...

Summer seems to be a time that fills up quickly. It seems to be a pattern that I have about three days or so in which I do nothing but laundry and sleep and read FICTION that I get to choose! Then everything starts happening. This summer it was grad school and tutoring former students and preparing to leave the country and preparing to lead Vacation Bible School the day I came back into the country. (Yes, I said 'yes' to too much.) Then being out of the country and coming straight back to Vacation Bible School. The day VBS was over, I left for Plano. We had a great time, but were busy there as well. Mom took a few days off work and we ran all over Dallas looking for fabric for her to have some throw pillows and a shower curtain made. Her colors are hard to find and so it took some searching!

Angela came home with me and we had fun going to an Astros game and the zoo and just taking it easy around the house. Ang is very low key and enjoys 'sister time' no matter what we do!

She left Wednesday and I had a training Thursday and Friday. Yesterday and today have been busy filled with errands that need to get done before I go back to work on Monday and Mom comes in town tonight. We're planning to sew curtains and work in my classroom some.

Whew! Summer is busy!

Yet there is still time for thinking... thinking sometimes gets me in trouble. Does anybody else think that? (um, about your own thinking...not mine!)

Thinks I've thought

I wish I knew how to be a better friend.
I need to pray more often.
I need to spend more time in the Word.
I wish I ate healthier.
I wish I had people to cook for on a more regular basis.
It is REALLY hot in Houston.
People in Haiti need help. I wish I could do more. I feel bad that I'm not doing more. I feel selfish that I don't do more.
Sometimes reading fiction is not good for my heart.
Sometimes people ask me deep questions and I don't know what they mean or what they're asking and I feel bad that I'm not that deep.

Then I start to think how selfish I am that all those thoughts are all about me and my feelings and reactions to things...and the cycle starts all over again.

Lord, help me to be dependent on You and You alone. Help me to conform my thoughts to Your thoughts and my ways to Your ways.

Overhauled List

Sooo....I'm yet again going to ignore that I've been an absentee blogger this summer. I'm just going to jump into the post.

My January List has actually made it waaaay longer than I thought it would. It needs some overhaul though. Some things don't need to be talked about for a year...so they're being taken off the list. Some things are on a back burner or...off the stove altogether, so they're being moved. That's what this post is for.

I realize this list is definitely for me...and that nobody else would have any reason to care about it...that's okay. I'll post other things soon. This is for me to be able to look back on things and use it kind of as an accountability.

Things I'm still interested in pursuing (or adding to the list):

Researching PhD programs
Cooking more regularly
Going to Chicago
Going on a cruise
Meet Angie Smith
Visit Crosspoint Church
Meet Brandi and Pete Wilson
Re-read the Proverbs 31 woman study...focus hard on the character traits the Lord leads me too
Go cash predominantly
Post more regularly
Spend quality time with the Lord more regularly.
Take more pictures of life as it happens!
Write my little Compassion boy more often.
Plan fun lessons on the SMART board for next year.
Have my neighbors over for dinner.